Meet The Team

Russ

Russ, like any other bachelor cat, spends his days sleeping, playing X-Box, drinking beer and writing poetry (not neccessarily in that order). The Russ philosophy on life is a simple one -- sleep, drink, play, write, fight crime -- which is apt because Russ is a simple cat, you can please him with a cold beer, distract him with a good video game and impress him with a well-written limerick, just don't become a guinea pig and start plotting world domination because he'll get 'ya!.

Russ has a positively uncomfortable habit of making intriguing -- and rarely appropriate -- noises at the most unexpected times. For example, if you are ever just sitting there minding your own business and have a questionable audio sensation, there's no need to check under the couch or the bottom of the fridge to see where this oddity came from, you are usually pretty safe to assume it was Russ. If confirmation is ever needed? Just glance across to him and study his no doubt comical grin... yeah, it was Russ alright.

A couple of years ago Russ got into a bit of trouble, hanging around with a bad crowd he met a mouse who supplied him with his first hit of catnip. This experience resulted in numerous holes in the wall, from where Russ repeatedly tried to crash-tackle his own shadow and Russ went missing for 3 days afterwards. He was found in the fridge sleeping in a tub of margarine. Russ has been clean for three months now because his dealer, the mouse, had the munchies one day and decided to eat the cheese that was precariously balanced on that metal/wood contraption thingy.

Russ is notoriously lazy -- much to the disdain of Pups who will happily spend hours playing roller hockey or chasing his tail -- and will often lie for hours with his mouth open to catch flies -- Russ believes it is much too far to the fridge to get something to eat. Lazy or not, Russ' speed cannot be matched, when chasing the evil guinea pigs he has been know to reach speeds well in excess of 200 KM/ph. Russ's licence has been suspended but he still drives saying "It's for the greater good"... Which is all very well but he also drives out at night whistling at the she-cats around the suburbs.

Pups

Pups, a nicer stuffed dog you will never meet. Pups isn't exactly what you would call smart -- although he has come up with some pretty interesting ideas like saving energy by pulling himself along the ground with only his front legs, leaving the back ones to drag along behind -- but he is honest, neat and enthusiastic.

When Pups was de-sexed, he took a vow of celibacy and tried to join the church as a priest. Unfortunately, the church does not allow dogs to be priests (even crime fighting ones) so Pups started on a quest to become an opera singer. He had often howled at nights to screams from the neighbours and thought it would be good to howl on stage to screams and applause. Since joining forces with Russ, Pups no longer sings Opera professionally but will use the skill to pry information from un-cultured hench-guinea-pigs.

The Christmas hat that Pups wears at all times is a mystery. No-one knows where it came from or how it came to be on Pups' head but any attempt to remove it will quickly lead to a mauled arm even though Pups denies its existence. When you ask him about the hat he is all like "What hat?" and when you're like "The Christmas hat on your head" he's all like "There is no Christmas hat! Leave me alone I'm going to play roller hockey." It is at this point that you realise Pups is a little bit 'not-all-there'. The green scarf is simply a fashion preference as Pups is very fashion conscious. He was once quoted as saying "I would spend all day shopping if I had hands to carry the bags and if I was allowed in the shops".

Pups was a big help to Russ when he was a nip addict and used to chase after Russ' car barking when Russ went to meet the mouse dealer. Pups may have been involved in suggesting the mouse eat the cheese but he will vehemently deny it. Pups loves playing with balls and most fights between Russ and Pups are started because Russ steals one of them.